36 Comments

Thank you for this beautiful reminder in the messy middle. As the absence of form dances in different shapes and visions, as well as many different emotions, before it truly reveals what is meant to be. Living in this myself, I go back-and-forth between openness and curiosity and frustration and disappointment. I appreciate you sharing your experience so I can see myself too. 💜

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Thanks Lynn! I love how you expressed the messy middle as a dance. Because if anything, it isn't stagnant! I know it can sure feel that way, when I get impatient. But this cryptic ambiguous space is constantly shapeshifting as the creativity begins to take form and manifest. The timing is out of my hands, which means this process definitely provides opportunities to feel the full spectrum of emotion! ❤️

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So true! Lots of opportunity to feel the full spectrum. 😂

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All is part of the journey

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I suspect that as much as we all seek certainty, we thrive in uncertainty. The messy middle is where we're shaken, stirred, moved. For me, the most creative moments have been when I feel I'm at the edge of an abyss, when the "not yet" option is gone and I must act. These are precious, empowering instances the universe bestows upon me that prompt me to change, mature and evolve.

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YES, YES, YES!!! I am right there with you D.C.! I do crave certainty, but the beauty of creativity, life and these undefined moments happen in uncertainty, from living the question. Meeting that edge of discontent, because the container has grown to small. It's time to jump, expand, morph or as you said, "change, mature and evolve." ❤️

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I enjoyed reading this, Julie! From the start (with your sore foot) you made me smile. I've been in a time of creative transition recently, which requires patience. Lots of final pieces to put in place on a project that's coming into form (a new book) and also the waiting that follows before the next project (another book) is made clear. Drawing the Ace of Swords the other night lifted my spirits and helped me prioritize. It was great to see that card here in your post. Glad to see you're posting again. ✨️

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Thanks so much Robin! Yes it does feel good to be posting again. How wonderful that you drew the Ace of Swords! And synchronistic too! Bringing with it new ideas, clarity and as you said, prioritizing. Blessings to you on your book and the navigation of this creative process! ❤️

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Julie, thanks so much! 🙏🏼

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In uncertainty there is new life

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YES there is! And that is wondrous! ❤️

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And there we are Julie, the joy of that space in between. For me the reflection is this. It always becomes really obvious as in, smack in the face obvious when I should move forward. Yet I will continue to torture myself with is it yet, now, what about now? Running myself round in circles, beating myself up. Why when it's so clear, this is something for me to take away and definitely work with. Thank you! xx

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Oh I so relate to that Louise. The clarity is there but yet the tortuous pattern continues. And even that needs some space. Yep, I'm a work in process too. ❤️

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Ohm

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Oh I love this. I have just come back from a break away and am feeling that I am in the middle...the messy...the unspoken...the unclear...and yet there is something that wishes to come through...and yet, in my case I need to rest more to allow, invite, REMEMBER what the magical words are to bring it forth.

To be messy is to be here and not here, grounded and not, aware and asleep, hopeful and unsure...and at the same time, so full of trust in the Divine/Goddess/Spirit.

Thank you dearest friend to this wondrous piece.

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Sam, welcome back and I am with you around not reentering as an off and running adventure. Being in that messy middle can be highly uncomfortable at times. Being ready but not quite, wanting to take actions but needing more time. And you described that messy middle beautifully, while also deeply held within the Sacred! I support you in taking your time. Stepping in and stepping out. Pausing, putting your toe in the water.

Sending you love dear friend. And a gently hug. ❤️

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Oh my gosh, this speaks so loudly to me personally and the world at large. And I love the question about how important are these things we can't see. They are everything. I often wonder if what is seen is the result, never the cause; the expression that comes after the messy middle. Thank you so much for these wonderful words and amazing insights! Love you! ❤️❤️❤️

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I love that Jenna! Yes the seen as the result not the cause. The cause as the unseen forces. Where do I align myself? What do I believe? For me it feels like a call to discernment and diligence. Cutting through what is made from manipulations and focusing on what is created from love, respect and connection instead. The challenge is when oppression is used to purposely deflect. That is why ongoing remembrance is key. To keep coming back to Her. And thankfully, She is always there waiting with open arms! ❤️

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Remembrance…I love being with that word!

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I get this Julie! "Enthusiastic because I’m loving the insights and downloads but unsettled because the threads that connect them are missing." I just try to stay with the discomfort until something shifts - I get more information, I feel like there's some kind of opening, I can act. Then I head toward whatever it is and see what happens. Usually, I end up in a fog again, wait it out, move again,etc.

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Emily, I relate! And why I see the path as anything but linear. Two steps forward, one to the side, fall down, get up, three steps backwards, jump up and down, etc. And I relate to the fog. I do fall into that hole. There are times I simply want to wallow in it and times I say Fu@k this, I'm moving on. In the end, the path I tend to takes me home, and it rarely attends to my timing. ❤️

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Oh yes, three steps backward, jump up and down and not the timing I expect. I appreciate your company on whatever kind of journey this is.

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CHIP! I love that acronym!

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Thanks Allysha! ❤️

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Julie, this post was so resonant. I've been in the messy middle, the hallway with no doors or windows for the past couple of years. It's so empowering to focus on the potentiality of this liminal space. I also so appreciate the normalization of how insidious the conditioning of culture is in making us pathologize liminality (I'd be willing to wager that we've all got CHIPs embedded in us...I know *I* do). Thank you for your beautiful articulation of all these concepts. Blessings to you as you meander through the middle.

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Keith, I really appreciate your words here. This middle ground is so potent, mystical and powerful. I truly see this when I let myself be there without the "insidious conditioning." And when I let go of expectation and timing. Yes, these embedded microCHIPs are devious and deceitful. Blessings to you too Keith as you navigate the messy middle, may it bring to you what you deeply long for. ❤️

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I love this writing. I’m familiar with this place, this space of dark fertility, conceiving something inside of itself and I’m trusting it much like I trusted the 8 babies being formed in my womb by an Intelligence I had no control over.

Trusting that felt sense of newness stirring inside, announcing itself to my body and mind in so many creative and lively ideas.

Without any efforting on my part at all, I set loose one of those ideas into the field, and am waiting to see how it roots and if it roots, I will know how to tend its growth. I’ve never quite felt this way about such a time as you speak of, this time that I am also in. I am fascinated beyond measure with the “unction” being felt and am trusting that this creative unction which is “life giving” knows how and when to move this body/mind into action on behalf of the whole.

I’m holding onto a phrase which keeps announcing itself in me, “And when spring came, she rose, more rooted.”

All the best Julie! It’s gonna be good. ❤️

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Lila love this. The womb is a precious and sacred place! A location in our bodies and a grander womb that is life itself. A potentiality that is always present, waiting to be entered into, acted on, received, blessed and birthed. I too am fascinated with the "unction". I feel this when I allow myself to be consumed by devotion. Giving myself over to the mother as she consumes me. It's falling into love.

AND these times of unformed creativity are both empowering and challenging. And it's in this rub, where what's in the way can transform into compost. Where the kinks are massaged. And the roots grow deep.

YES Lila, we rise rooted! ❤️

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Thank you Julie! I enjoy your writings in the beautiful depths of soulful loving and living. I’ve pulled three of the aces this month so love your reflection on them. I’m forwarding your blog onto a friend.

Namaste 🙏❤️❤️🙏

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Thanks so much Carol, and great to hear from you! Wow, three aces! Truly a time of new beginnings and creativity! Thanks for the "forwarding." Blessings to you! ❤️

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CHIP can take a hike! I love that idea on naming to reclaim our power. I am deep in the liminal, once again. In that middle where all is fluid and moving every which way. I think I’ll stay here for a bit, been a while.

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I agree CHIP can take a hike. A permanent one! And how wonderful that you feel that fluidity again. My heart leapt when I read your words. Yep, I understand, stay as long as you like. ❤️

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Many things resolved-the universe took care of me in the best way.

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Hi Julie, I'm delighted this question of "How important are the things we can not see?" has called to you, thanks for the shout out. It's been so potent for me to live with this question for the last few year. It's stirs my curiosity, dare I say, like a caldron and has offered me new eyes.

I recently finished in a fabulous two year program, "Secrets my Grandmother Told Me" offered by Yerusha and taught by Reb Nadya that delves into The Tree of Life, and Kabbalah. FYI, I'm not Jewish, so don't let that cause your to hesitate if you aren't either.

Much of my reading kept pointing me to the Tree of Life and the lived wisdom of the Kabbalah. When I learned that 9 of the 10 nodes on the tree are in the invisible realm a part of me felt like living with that question had brought me to the class.

Check it out, you may finds called to it, too.

Here's a link to the course: https://www.yerusha.org/wisdom-school

and Yerusha is on Substack, I subscribe to them. Feel free to DM me if you have any questions about it, or anyone else considering it. The transmission Reb Nadya offers gave me my first lived experience of devotion in a way that I could trust and claim fully in my life, my living and yes, my dwelling in love.

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Thanks, Morgan, for the information. I have been working with this question for a while too. Not formulated in these words, but I recognized it when I read it from your response! It calls me to see magic everywhere! The unseen beings that are always present with us. The power of love! Life's fullness as potentiality, along with Her creative forces.

I love the name of the program you attended, for there is beauty in elder wisdom. And I have been drawn to the Kabbalah for years now. Right now, I only have a surface understanding, but I do long to dive deeper. As a tarot reader and lover of the Thoth decks, the Kabbalah is fully present there. And, yes Malkhut as the only manifestation in form! Which is so powerful knowing that there are these nine unseen nodes woven together to support this.

I did check out the link, love its affiliation with the Lilith institute. I see the upcoming classes on the kabbalah, maybe this is the nudge needed to dive deeper! ❤️

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We have Thoth in common, too, After decades of using it I had no idea the correlation between the Tree of Life and tarot, the 22 pathways of the Major Arcana. I’ve loved discovering another layer of meaning.

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